The Weird, Wacky, and Wonderful Adventures
by LaurelSolo
Summary: A silly tale of two girls with WAY to much time on their hands. Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, Star Wars and MUCH MUCH MORE! Created with my best friend Deanna as we endured long and boring lectures in college...


Title: The Weird, Wacky, and Wonderful Adventures of Deanna Meredith: Elf Maiden of Rivendell and Lauren Gragert: Jedi Knight of Corsucant  
  
Author: Deanna and Lauren (aka LaurelSolo)  
  
Rating: VERY G-rated  
  
Keywords: Star Wars, Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings and MANY MANY more of the obsessions of Lauren and Deanna.  
  
Author's Note: If you aren't a friend of me and Deanna's... there is a HIGH possibility that you won't understand a word of what we're talking about. This story is the result of VERY boring classes at our university in Abilene, TX... yes it does exist... We have passed this story back and forth for the past year and a half and I decided to type it all up so that she can read it (she's studying abroad this semester). So, if you're a friend of ours- FABULOUS!! You'll understand most of this and just laugh because we're so silly. If you have no idea who either of us are and are just reading a random fanfic that sounded interesting- FABULOUS!!! You probably won't get it and probably won't find any of it funny, but we're glad you stopped by! It's so nice to hear from the fans.  
  
Dedication: To the wacky people who contributed to the story, either directly or indirectly. Ruth, for just adding to the fun. Lauren (the tall one), for giving us lots of laughs during "THE WAR." Mandy, for thinking I was nuts when I first met her. And finally, all of the boring professors that we've had over the past two years at good ole Abilene Christian University!  
  
It was a bright afternoon in Rivendell and best friends Lauren Gragert, a Jedi Knight from Coruscant, and Deanna Meredith, an Elf Maiden from Rivendell were lounging in the sun. Suddenly, Deanna jumped up from her lounge chair and proceeded to leave the porch.  
  
"Where are you going?" Lauren asked.  
  
"Oh, I just got a sudden impulse to make out with Lego," she said grinning widely as she always did when she talked about Legolas, her boyfriend.  
  
"Have fun!" Lauren called after her and then mumbled under her breath, "Stupid boyfriend – has to be a hundred light years away...has to fight in a war...has to be a war hero....stupid noble Jedi..."  
  
Lauren was so caught up in her conversation with herself, she didn't notice that someone was standing behind her.  
  
A voice shook her out of her reverie. "What?"  
  
"Oh nothing, just talking to myself..." she answered off-handedly.  
  
"Lauren!" the voice said powerfully, "I have come to take you and Deanna on a mission!"  
  
Lauren finally looked up at her visitor, "Dumbledore!"  
  
"Yes, Lauren – Harry, Ron, Hermione, and Ginny say hello to you both and asked me to personally invite you to their weddings."  
  
"Great – Dee and I will be there!"  
  
"Unfortunately, that is not why I am here – I need you and Deanna to go into the 'real world' and help find more Jedi and more witches and wizards. Youwill be going to a little town called Abilene in the country of America on the planet earth."  
  
"Abilene? What's there?" she asked.  
  
"Well...nothing – except a small college and a Super Walmart."  
  
After telling Lauren this, Dumbledore left promising to be back in a few days with more information. He assigned Lauren to tell Deanna the news and for them to get ready to go.  
  
"Oooo, an important mission. How exciting!" Deanna replied to the news. "Does this mean I have to leave Legolas?"  
  
"Yes, it does," replied Lauren, "but it will be good for the both of you. Now he can focus more on his work."  
  
"You're right. So where are we going? London? Paris? New York? Egypt?"  
  
"Guess again," Lauren said unhappily. "Try Abilene, Texas. A little nothing town in no-where Texas."  
  
"What!" Deanna exclaimed and then mumbled some complaint in Elvish. "Is there really a need for us there? Can't we go somewhere more exciting?"  
  
"I know, I know, but this is where Dumbledore says the need for us is. I guess there is a large population of potential Jedi's, witches, and wizards. We just have to trust him and be prepared to leave."  
  
So Deanna and Lauren went back to their rooms and prepared for their trip to earth. This would be Lauren's second time to visit the "real world" but it would be Deanna's first. They were both very excited but a little nervous.  
  
The night before they left, Lauren and Deanna had a huge going-away party. Lauren invited all of her friends from her galaxy which meant every single Skywalker and Solo was there –and where Skywalkers and Solos are, their fan club is close behind.  
  
The large party room was already full of Deanna's friends. Every Hobbit, Elf, man and Dwarf of Middle Earth was present. Legolas was in full swing as he started a game he liked to call "Toss-the-Dwarf."  
  
As Lauren's guests began to arrive, Lauren and Deanna realized a small problem. They watched as Luke Skywalker sauntered over to Gandalf.  
  
"I'll bet I can move a bigger object than you can!" Luke told him.  
  
Gandalf looked him up and down – narrowing his eyes in a cool, demeaning way, "You're on young fool of a Skywalker!"  
  
Lauren and Deanna watched as their party guests left the room faster than you could say "Jedi vs. Wizard."  
  
Lauren watched as her boyfriend Jacen Solo ran past, screaming, "We Jedi are going to kick all you wizards' –"  
  
"Jacen!" Lauren shouted.  
  
He stopped abruptly and ran back, giving her a swift peck on the cheek, "Sorry, Love, I'll watch my language!" and he darted out of the room.  
  
Lauren and Deanna rolled their eyes and shook their heads.  
  
Deanna sighed dramatically and said something in Elvish.  
  
"Don't do that!" Lauren said peevishly.  
  
"Do what?"  
  
"Mutter things in languages I don't understand! If you're going to mutter something , mutter it in Huttese or Corellian or something!"  
  
Deanna laughed, "But you don't know those languages either!"  
  
Lauren gave her a hard look, "I know some words," she said indignantly.  
  
"Well, I wasn't saying anything about cats, fish, or hot guys – so you wouldn't have understood it if I spoke in those languages."  
  
Lauren gave a short laugh, "Point taken!"  
  
"I just said, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!"  
  
the two girls laughed and ran outside to join the large group that was watching Luke Skywalker and Gandalf the White use the force and magic to lift objects.  
  
The fight went on for about thirty minutes but Deanna and Lauren stopped them when Gandalf said he was going to lift their house. It was quite enjoyable to watch the two go back and forth and both were very strong. In the end everyone agreed (whether out of truth or fear, we don't know) that they were equal in their use of their lifting talents.  
  
Once the fight was over Lauren decided to introduce everyont to the American game of Kiss-n-tackle, also known as Embrace-And-Stop-Forward- Motion. She explained it to everyone and then they split up into groups.  
  
Everyone had so much fun. The funniest couple was Gandalf and a "female" dwarf. It was such a height difference but the dwarf was so determined that she knocked him down and got him.  
  
"Who would have thought that Gandalf would ever get 'hit-on' by a dwarf!" Deanna shouted as she and Lauren rolled on the floor laughing.  
  
After the game many of the guests started to leave because they all had a long journey back home. Deanna and Lauren said good-bye to everyone and they were wished best of luck. They girls almost forgot why they were having the party and the fear and excitement of leaving came back. Before they could begin to worry to much, Legolas swept Deanna away to play more Kiss-n-Tackle, leaving Lauren and Jacen to have some alone time also.  
  
The next morning Lauren and Deanna woke up late and found Dumbledore waiting for them outside.  
  
"Are you ready to go?" he asked.  
  
Deanna yawned and moaned, "We were born ready."  
  
"That's what I want to hear! Get your stuff together and we are out of here."  
  
"Um, Professor?" Lauren said. "How do we get from here to there?"  
  
"Well, somewhere in my pocket I have a port-key. I'm just not sure where. So while I look for it, you get your things and say your good-byes."  
  
Deanna and Lauren went to get their backpacks and said their good- byes. Bilbo, Frodo, Sam, Gandalf and Luke stayed behind to see them off. After saying bye to all them, Deanna and Lauren turned to Legolas and Jacen and gave them many hugs and kisses until Dumbledore said, "Time to go, ladies."  
  
They turned to him and saw a roll of toilet paper sitting on the floor. The three bent over to touch the roll, and immediately felt a jerk from behind their belly buttons, pulling them forward. Their feet left the ground as they sped through screaming wind and a blur of colors. Before long their feet slammed into the hard ground of Earth.  
  
They looked at each other and then observed their surroundings. They were standing in the middle of a large auditorium. There were people standing all around them and were all staring at them curiously. Deanna decided to take matters into her own hands.  
  
"Greetings from Middle Earth!" she bellowed loudly.  
  
There was a long silence that followed and suddenly everyone burst out laughing. Deanna and Lauren looked at each other in confusion, and then they suddenly were taken aside by an older looking man.  
  
"My name is Dr. Money. I'm an old friend of Dumbledore's. It is wonderful to meet you both." He looked at them curiously, "It's odd, you both look like a couple of Alumnus from a couple of years ago – one is on Broadway now and the other is a missionary in Honduras – know anyone like that?"  
  
Lauren shook her head, "no sir. We want to thank you for allowing us to stay here."  
  
Dr. Money smiled warmly at them, "I'm very excited that you are coming here to find witches, wizards, and Jedi. I'm a wizard myself; I'm actually a part of the Hogwarts class that Dumbledore graduated from – though I was a Ravenclaw."  
  
The girls grinned at him, "We are 'honorary' Hogwarts alumni. We are going to finish school in a few years," Deanna explained.  
  
"Now which of you is the Jedi?"  
  
"I am," Lauren said proudly, showing off her ligh saber.  
  
Dr. Money grinned, "Wonderful! Well, let's show you around campus and show you to your dorm before chapel gets out." He observed the circular auditorium that was now singing something that sounded like Angels and prostates (which made Lauren and Deanna blush furiously), "This place can get a little crazy."  
  
And so the three of them left the auditorium (which Dr. Money referred to Moody Coliseum), and stepped into the bright Abilene morning.  
  
As the girls began to look around and take in their surroundings, they were shocked at how ugly everything was. The trees were puny and few, the ground was totally flat and you could see for miles, and it looked like they were in a drought because there were no rivers anywhere.  
  
"What have they done to their land?" Deanna whispered to Lauren.  
  
"I don't know! Compared to Rivendell this place looks like a trash yard," Lauren whispered back. "Where did all the nature go?"  
  
"So how do you like our campus so far?" Dr. Money asked cheerfully.  
  
"It's beautiful!" They both answered.  
  
As they walked through the campus, the girls were taking in as much information as possible to learn the surroundings they would be working in. They all began to notice some strange looks directed at Deanna. Very quickly Dr. Money pulled the girls into a corner, whispered a charm and pointed his wand at Deanna. As he did this, Deanna's ears changed shape and looked like everyone else's.  
  
"Sorry about that, but y'all can't stand out," Dr. Money replied.  
  
The girls mouthed the word "y'all" to each other with a questionable look on their faces.  
  
Dr. Money gave a quick tour of the campus and Deanna and Lauren had no idea how they would remember where everything was. Then they came to a building that had balconies all over it. Dr. Money informed them that this is where they would be living. He took them up some stairs and down a hallway where he called out "Man on the Hall!" They came to a room which he opened up for them.  
  
"Welcome to your new home!"  
  
The room was so tiny compared to what the girls were used to but it was pleasantly decorated with nature stuff and regular college decorations.  
  
"I will leave y'all to get situated but feel free to visit me any time you need something. I will be checking in periodically to see how y'all (there's that word again) are doing. Good luck!" and he shut the door.  
  
"Oh wow! I cannot believe how small this room is. I am going to go crazy in a closed space," Deanna said. "I really like the decorations though."  
  
"Yeah, I hope we won't be in here very much. Where will I brush up on my light saber dueling? And you on your archery?"  
  
"We sure are going to get close to each other over these weeks, huh?" Deanna laughed.  
  
They both started to unpack what they brought along with them. When they opened their closets they had a whole new wardrobe that would help them blend in.  
  
"These clothes are weird, but kind of fun too. I think I am going to like this job!" Lauren said.  
  
The rest of the day, Lauren and Deanna unpacked, organized their room and walked around the campus to find where things were. For dinner they went to this place called the Bean. It was full of students and the food was okay. The girls soon felt the presence of something more powerful than they had all day. They could not tell where it was coming from but it was a great encouragement. Since they were both tired, they both watched this new thing called a TV and then went to bed.  
  
"This has been an interesting day," Deanna whispered as she fell asleep. "I can't wait for tomorrow. Good night"  
  
"Good night."  
  
The next morning the girls woke up early and prepared to go to their first classes. Lauren's first class was a class called Bible, and Deanna's first class was a class called Sociology.  
  
Lauren pulled her Hogwarts cloak on and turned to Deanna, "When do we want to –"  
  
She was cut off by a loud shriek from Deanna.  
  
Lauren jumped, "What's the matter with you?"  
  
"You can't wear that!" she said pointing to the cloak. "People will know who you are!"  
  
Lauren took the cloak off from around her shoulders, "Well, that's fine, but goodness you don't have to scream about it!"  
  
Deanna gave a sheepish look, "Sorry 'bout that. I'm a little highstrung I suppose."  
  
Lauren laughed, "Well that certainly is the understatement of the year! In any case, do you wanna meet and go to chapel together?"  
  
Deanna nodded, "I hope they sing good songs!"  
  
The two girls walked out of the dorm and walked to their separate classes. Deanna soon found out that there were several people who had magical potential. Her sociology class was amazing because she could feel the prescence of magic in the room. And when her professor approached her and told her that she didn't have to take any tests in his class, it put an extra spring in her step.  
  
Lauren also had a good first class. Professor Sharp was so obviously a wizard she laughed out loud. He caught her eye and winked as he turned a page in the Bible without using his hands.  
  
Needless to say the girls were happily jabbering when they met and walked into chapel together.  
  
They sat down together and continued giggling when al tall red head came over and tapped Lauren on the shoulder. She whipped around and couldn't help notice how good-looking he was. He had another guy with him.  
  
"Are you Lauren and Deanna?" the red head asked with an English sounding accent evident in his voice.  
  
The girls nodded and he shook their hands. Lauren noticed that it was quite callosed, but still warm and friendly.  
  
"I'm Charlie Weasley, Ron's older brother. I believe you know him, my sister, and their respective fiancés...in any case, this is my friend Matt Coker. He helps with dragons in Romania."  
  
Lauren and Deanna heard very little of this; they were wiping the drool from their mouths. Deanna recovered first.  
  
"And you're here because..."  
  
"Well, we're here to keep an eye on you two," Matt said grinning at Deanna.  
  
He crossed over to Deanna and they started talking and laughing.  
  
Charolie sat down next to Lauren. "I hope you two find what you're looking for here," he said.  
  
The lights dimmed and the song leader started "Sing and Be Happy." Lauren nodded, a grin brightening her face.  
  
"Me too," she said and then they joined in with the singing.  
  
After chapel Deanna and Lauren went to their English class together but not without making plans to meet Matt and Charlie for dinner in the Bean Sprout.  
  
"Where is the Bean Sprout now? Maybe we should have asked," Deanna laughed.  
  
"Yeah, I'm not sure either but we can find it," Lauren said back.  
  
As they were walking to class they were grabbed from behind and pulled into the bushes. They both went into attack mode and pulled out their light saber and sword. They relaxed when they saw that it was just Dr. Money with a surprised look on his face.  
  
"Oh, sorry, sir!" Deanna exclaimed. "You just scared us."  
  
"No, no, it's my fault. I should not have grabbed you so suddenly. I just have some news for you."  
  
The girls looked at him with great interest, and waited for him to continue.  
  
"Yes?" they said together.  
  
"Oh yeah! Well first, how is it going so far? I hope you don't mind having Charlie and Matt help y'all out some. They are really great guys. I know they are excited to have you here."  
  
"It is going really well so far. The teacher are really great and I can feel so much of the Force and magic around us," Lauren said.  
  
"Yeah, we are really excited!" exclaimed Deanna. "And of course we don't mind Charlie and Matt. It's nice to have some students who are like us."  
  
"So what's the news?" Lauren asked.  
  
"Well it's nothing you would expect. I just have a letter for you two from back at Rivendell. Dumbledore agrees with this decision. It will really help your focus. Now get on to class and don't worry about being late. Come talk to me if you have any questions."  
  
With that, Dr. Money walked away and the girls headed to class. Before going into class they stopped and opened the letter. This is what it said:  
  
To our dearest Lauren and Deanna,  
We hope that everything is going great on your mission. We know you are going to do an amazing job! We have been discussing our relationships with Dumbledore and reluctantly agreed on some things. We think it would be best for the four of us if we take a break while we are separated. We need to focus on our work and you on yours and this will take away from some of our many worries. We still care for you very much but sometimes work must come first. This will free us up from worrying what each other are doing, whether we would approve and whether we are being faithful. We want you to be free to meet and make relationships that are needed. I hope you understand and we can pick up where we left off when you get back. Good Luck! We are so proud of you.  
With Much Love,  
Jacen and Legolas  
  
"Oh wow!" Deanna said sadly.  
  
"I'm sad, but it does make sense," Lauren said. "We do need to keep our focus on our work. And I have felt my mind wandering to Jacen when it should have been."  
  
"Yeah, I agree. It almost feels like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. We will be okay."  
  
They gave each other a big hug, wiped the tears from their eyes and walked into English. Amazingly, no one even noticed how late they were.  
  
After a week of being in Abilene, Lauren and Deanna were the boredest they'd ever been.  
  
"I'm bored!" Deanna whined for the upteenth time that day. She was laying on her bed – half her body dangling off.  
  
Lauren sighed, "Where is all the action? There's nothing to do in this stupid town!" She hit the couch that she was sitting on and gave a long, mournful grunt.  
  
Just then, a knock was heard on the door. Deanna sat up quickly and looked around to see if there was anything that they needed to put away. She grabbed her wand and heard Lauren mutter "Accio lightsaber."  
  
They nodded at each other and Deanna said sweetly, "Come in!"  
  
Two girls entered the room. One had bushy brown hair and was slighting shorter than the other one who had bright red hair and was extremely freckly. They both had huge grins on their faces.  
  
"Surprise!" They said happily.  
  
"Ginny! Hermione!" the girls cried happily.  
  
They ran and gave the girls big hugs.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Deanna asked.  
  
Hermione grinned, "We decided to come and visit you guys. Charlie said you were going a little stir crazy. So we decided to come visit you!"  
  
The girls grabbed their wands and Lauren summoned her lightsaber to her and Deanna sword, and they left the dorm.  
  
They walked out of the building and into the bright sun and saw Harry and Ron standing there.  
  
The girls squealed and ran to hug them. Harry and Ron greeted the girls happily and then left to go get the car from the other side of campus so they could get ice cream together.  
  
"This is the best day ever!" Deanna laughed as she looked around at her friends.  
  
Ginny grinned, "The only thing that would make it better would be if Jacen and Legolas were here."  
  
The girls were instantly subdued and looked at each other silently.  
  
"Well, we're on a break..." Deanna said softly.  
  
"A break?" Hermione replied.  
  
"Yeah," Lauren said, "Just so we can focus on our work without worrying about each other."  
  
Hermione nodded, "I can understand that. Ron and I thought about doing that at one point...we decided against it though."  
  
"In any case...we have met these two really great guys!" Lauren said happily.  
  
"Who?" Ginny asked.  
  
Deanna laughed, "Well Lauren sort of fancies your brother, Ginny!"  
  
Ginny paled considerably, "Which one?"  
  
Lauren sighed, "Charlie...."  
  
Ginny laughed, "Oh dear...what is it about my brothers? In any case, who is it you fancy Deanna?"  
  
Deanna laughed, "Matt."  
  
Hermione sputtered, "Coker?"  
  
Deanna nodded, "Yes, what's wrong with that?"  
  
Ginny was holding a stitch in her side and was heaving at her uncontrollable laughter, "Well...I don't know how to put this to you gently, but, Deanna...he's gay!"  
  
Deanna went from pink to green in seconds, "What do you mean gay?"  
  
Lauren was now rolling on the ground in laughter, "I think she means he fancies boys bums rather than girls bums!"  
  
Just then Harry and Ron returned with the car to see three girls cackling like hyenas and Deanna standing in the middle with a scowl on her face.  
  
Ron got out of the car, "What is going on out here?"  
  
Deanna scowled, "They're laughing at me!"  
  
Lauren gathered herself together and managed to retell the story before bursting into hysterics once again.  
  
The boys were now laughing as hard as the girls were and Deanna now had a small smile on her lips and before long she had joined in as well. It was quite funny after all.  
  
And that is where Charlie and Matt found the group – laughing on the small lawn of Sikes Dormitory.  
  
"Oi! What's so funny?" Charlie shouted over the group.  
  
"Oh nothing," Harry said with a wicked grin on his face, "Just the sexual preference of your friend right here."  
  
He was quickly shut up as Ginny smacked him upside the head.  
  
Matt grinned, "Don't worry about it, Gin. It's not a big deal. It had to come out sometime!"  
  
Deanna giggled.  
  
Lauren looked at the car and sighed unhappily, "I don't want to get ice cream! Can't we go to the Burrow? I haven't seen your family in a long time!" She gave Ron a pout of her lip.  
  
Deanna nodded her head vigorously, "Yes! That sounds so much better than staying here!"  
  
Harry grinned, "Let's do it! Mrs. Weasley would be more than happy to see you!"  
  
Lauren and Deanna squealed with delight and brought out their wands and apparated quickly. Everyone soon followed and Hermione, being the final one, looked around her and muttered, "I hope no one saw that," and disappeared.  
  
But somebody had.  
  
In a matter of seconds all eight of them were crowded into the Weasley kitchen being hugged by a very surprised and excited Mrs. Weasley.  
  
"What a wonderful surprise!" she cried. "I am so glad you have come to visit me. You are just in time for lunch, too."  
  
They all sat down, and Mrs. Weasley gave Lauren and Deanna an extra hug.  
  
"It has been so long girls. I miss your smiling faces! How is your mission going in Abilene? Are you keeping my Charlie in line?"  
  
Actually mum," Charlie said, "It has been the other way around. These girls get in trouble faster than Matt and I can keep up with them!"  
  
"We do not!" Deanna exclaimed. "...Okay, maybe we do but it's not like we try to."  
  
"Yeah, things just happen to us," Lauren said.  
  
"No, you guys are just crazy," Matt laughed. "Like the other day Deanna was eating in the Bean and a guy accidentally picked up her backpack instead of his. Deanna pulled out her sword and scared the guy so bad he almost cried. We had to give a memory charm to everyone in the Bean. It took me, Charlie and Dr. Money four hours!"  
  
Everyone was laughing so hard and Deanna cried out, "How was I supposed to know he wasn't trying to steal my stuff? I was trained to always expect the worst!"  
  
"That's not the worst of it," Charlie laughed. "One day they got bored and decided to enchant everything in their room. Just about everything in the their room was dancing to some music group called the Backseat Boys or something."  
  
"BackSTREET!" All the girls yelled.  
  
"Whatever. They were being so loud that their neighbors came over to ask them to be quiet and they got quite a shock."  
  
"We have done so many memory charms since we have been there that I am surprised those Muggles have anything left," said Matt.  
  
Everyone finished eating while listening to stories of burning trees, practical jokes, and many misunderstandings. Then they went outside to enjoy the beautiful weather.  
  
Harry and Ron were sitting at the table playing chess, Mrs. Weasley was talking to Ginny about who knows what, Lauren and Charlie were sitting in the shade of a tree, and Deanna, Hermione and Matt were observing all of this.  
  
"If Lauren isn't careful, she is going to drool all over him!" Deanna laughed.  
  
"I know!" Hermione exclaimed. "At lunch she could hardly keep her eyes off of him. I have never known her to be so forward."  
  
"Well, he is pretty good looking you know," said Matt.  
  
Hermione and Deanna looked at him in shock and then remembered what they had recently learned.  
  
"Sorry. I'll not talk about him like that."  
  
"Thanks," they both said.  
  
"So anyways," Hermione said, "Aren't y'all missing class to be here? Can you do that?"  
  
"Oh give her a break!" Ron shouted from the table. The he received a nasty look from his fiancé.  
  
"No, it's okay," Deanna laughed. "We try and go to class as much as possible so that we can meet people and search them out, but Dr. Money charmed the students and teachers to not notice when we are late or not there. We also have no homework so we can focus on our real mission. It is the best way to do school ever!"  
  
"No homework? That's so sad!"  
  
Everyone turned to look at the Burrow as they heard, "Hello! Anyone home?"  
  
"We are out here, Oliver!" Charlie shouted as he ran towards the house. He opened the back door and out came Oliver Wood.  
  
Deanna and Lauren looked at each other with shock on their faces as they mouthed "Oliver Wood" to each other.  
  
"Oliver! So nice to see you again," Mrs. Weasley said. "Can I get you anyting to eat or drink?"  
  
"No thanks, ma'am," he said, "It's you guys. How is everyone?"  
  
They all came over to tell him hi and then turned to look at Lauren and Deanna as they both cleared their throats.  
  
"Oh how rude of us," Harry said. "Oliver, this is Deanna Meredith, Elf Maiden of Rivendell, and this is Lauren Gragert, Jedi Knight of Coruscant."  
  
Harry then turned to Deanna and Lauren and said, "I think you both know who Oliver is."  
  
"Of course we do! Who doesn't?!" Deanna exclaimed and blushed as Oliver kissed her hand.  
  
"Did you guys go to Hogwarts?" he asked.  
  
"Yes, but we are not finished yet," Lauren explained.  
  
"Yeah, we have been doing it off and on, some on campus, some off, but we should finish our seven years in about five," said Deanna.  
  
"Wow! That's very impressive. I guess that is why I have never seen you before."  
  
"Oliver is going to be taking Matt's place in Abilene," Charlie explained. "Matt must go back to Romania to help out with some dragon problems."  
  
"Awww, Matt," Lauren said. "We are going to miss you! We have had fun watching you run around cleaning up our messes."  
  
"Ha!" Matt laughed, "Have fun with them Oliver. We won't even begin to tell you the horror stories."  
  
"But wait," Deanna said, "Oliver aren't you the captain of the Chudley Cannons? What about them?"  
  
"Well, I kind of have to take a year off from Quidditch, doctor's orders."  
  
"What for? You don't look hurt to me!"  
  
"I have been having high blood pressure and ulcer problems from my stress and bad temper. Against my will the doctor decided I should take a year off to relax some."  
  
"So when I heard Oliver wanted a job I asked him to join me, and here he is," Charlie explained.  
  
"Well that is great!" cried Deanna. "I feel very honored to be babysat by the famous Oliver wood."  
  
Everyone laughed and then decided to have a quick game of relaxing Quidditch before time to go back. After the game they came back to the Burrow to say their thanks and good-bys.  
  
"Don't worry!" Ginny said, "We will come rescue you again sometime soon."  
  
"Good luck on your mission," laughed Ron, "I am sure you will need it."  
  
"Thanks!" the girls said back.  
  
"Oh, I was talking to Charlie and Oliver. I think they need it more than you."  
  
"Bye everyone!" the four cried as they apparated back to Abilene.  
  
"Well, that was fun while it lasted," said Lauren when they arrived back to Abilene.  
  
"Back to searching through the boring Muggles it is," Deanna replied. "Hey, Oliver, do you want a tour of the campus?"  
  
"Yeah, that would be great!"  
  
Lauren laughed at Deanna's forwardness, but very glad to have the chance to be alone with Charlie.  
  
"Maybe it won't be so bad after all," she thought to herself.  
  
Charlie and Lauren smiled at each other as they heard Oliver say, "So, Elf Maiden of Rivendell, huh? You have to tell me all about that!"  
  
"Okay," Deanna said grinning very big. "But only if you tell me about this famous temper of yours and how I can avoid it."  
  
They both started laughing as they walked very closely to each other towards the campus center.  
  
Lauren and Charlie giggled softly and decided to walk around campus. Charlie grabbed Lauren's hand and she sighed happily.  
  
The moon was bright and it shone across the campus. As the two walked contentedly past the Bible building, Lauren tensed visibly.  
  
Charlie noticed and looked questioningly at her.  
  
"Someone is following us..." she said quietly.  
  
She shoved her hand into her pocket and grabbed her wand. She swished and flicked and quietly muttered "Accio Deanna!"  
  
Moments later, Deanna was zooming across the campus, an unhappy grumble apparent on her face.  
  
"What was that all about?" she sputtered angrily, "I was kinda in the middle of something!"  
  
"Someone was following us!" Lauren said defensively, "I thought you might want to help get rid of them!"  
  
Deanna gaped, "Lauren, you idiot! Hello, if you were using your BRAIN in any way you would realize that – HELLO – they were probably scared away by a flying person and HELLO – now they know we're witches!"  
  
"Well..." Lauren sputtered, "okay, so I am an idiot, but if you use 'hello' in a sentence one more time, you're a bigger idiot than I am."  
  
Charlie tapped Lauren on the shoulder, "Lauren?"  
  
She whirled on him angrily, "What, Dragon Boy??"  
  
He narrowed his eyes, but then laughed and shook his head, "We still have company."  
  
Lauren and Deanna turned where he was pointing and their mouths dropped in shock as they gasped in unison...  
  
"Ruth?"  
  
Ruth was standing there, staring at them looking very pale.  
  
"Oh, crap!" Deanna muttered.  
  
"What is going on?" Wood yelled as he ran towards them. "No wonder you get in so much trouble. You should know you can't go around using your ma... Oh, no!"  
  
They all just stood there having no clue what to do. Them Ruth spoke up.  
  
"Umm...what.....how....uh....what's going on?"  
  
"What are you talking about, Ruthie? Deanna said in her I-can't-lie voice.  
  
"You can't play dumb with me," she said, sounding a bit more confident. "I saw y'all the other day also when you disappeared into thin air. I thought I was losing my mind, but now I know something is up."  
  
"Oh....um...okay," Deanna stuttered. "Let us talk this over then."  
  
The four turned to each other not really knowing what to say.  
  
"Well, I don't think there is any question about what to do," said Charlie. "Deanna, go put a memory charm on her."  
  
"Well, if we were going to do that, Deanna would not be the one to ask because everytime she does it, the person loses way more than they are supposed to," Lauren said smiling at Deanna. "But I don't think we should."  
  
"I agree!" said Deanna.  
  
"Well, I agree with Charlie," said Wood. "She's a muggle so she can't know."  
  
"But she is also our friend," said Lauren.  
  
"Yeah! And it would be really nice to have one friend here to confide in," Deanna said.  
  
"Definitely not!" said Charlie. "What would Dumbledore say?"  
  
"Well what if we put a charm on her so that she can't tell anyone else?" Wood suggested. "I know I have done that before."  
  
"I don't know"  
  
"Pleeeeease, Charlie!" Lauren and Deanna whined while giving cute, puppy-dog eyes.  
  
"OK! Just don't do that again."  
  
"Yeah!" They cried and turned to face Ruth.  
  
"Come on over, Ruthie. We have so much to tell you!"  
  
"Wow," Ruth said as she stared at the two girls, "Do that again!"  
  
Lauren and Deanna grinned at each other and yelled "Accio" at the same time. The girls giggled as their lighsaber and crossbow flew to their hands.  
  
Ruth laughed, "That is really neat – I only wish I could do something like that..."  
  
Lauren grinned, "Oh, but you can! You have some magical abilities!"  
  
Ruth shook her head and tears began to well up in her eyes, "No, I don't – I promise...I'll never be able to do anything like that."  
  
Deanna looked confused, "I don't understand...Lauren has felt that you have magical potential through the Force. She can't be wrong! She's a Jedi!"  
  
Ruth's eyes spilled tears now and she muttered something unintelligible.  
  
"Ruthie, what is it?" Deanna asked.  
  
"Yeah, Ruthie, you can tell us!" Lauren said nodding her head.  
  
Ruth looked at her hands and large tears splattered onto her hands which she was currently wringing in her lap.  
  
"I'm a....a....a squib!" she sobbed.  
  
Lauren and Deanna looked at each other questioningly as she continued.  
  
"My sisters and I all are....my parents are both magical, but something  
  
happened and..." She began sobbing hysterically now and looked at the two confused friends.  
  
Lauren spoke up first, "Ruth...I've felt your magical powers through the Force – even Deanna felt them, and she's not even a Jedi! Perhaps your magical powers are late-bloomers!"  
  
Deanna nodded, "Yeah, you should try again! You could even be like Arabella Figg! She didn't acquire magical powers until she was almost ten!"  
  
Ruth had stopped crying and now have a tremendous shudder of breath. She looked questioningly at Lauren.  
  
"You really can feel magical powers?"  
  
"Yes, that was why me and Deanna were put on this mission. We both have a special knack for feeling them. Like I said, even Deanna who isn't a Jedi!" Lauren said furiously.  
  
"Way to rub it in, babe," Deanna said.  
  
"Yeah, well, I'm not an elf!" Lauren retorted.  
  
"Fair enough."  
  
Ruth sighed, "What is up with the Jedi and the elf – can we get back to me?"  
  
Lauren glared at her and shoved her hand into her picket, then thrust it towards Ruth, "Fine – make light!"  
  
Ruth took the wand gingerly, then looked to Deanna for support.  
  
"You can do it, Ruthie – Lumos!"  
  
Lauren grinned, her glare long gone, "Yeah, go on!"  
  
Ruth looked at the wnad and swished and flicked and bellowed "Lumos!"  
  
The tip of the wand did nothing and Ruth sighed sadly.  
  
"Come on, Ruth, try again and really concentrate this time!" Deanna said.  
  
As Ruth muttered "Lumos" with a look of complete concentration, the tip of the wand began to glow slightly, and as Ruth's eyes got larger, so did the light. As her confidence grew, so did the brightness. Ruth gave a whoop of excitement and laughed loudly. She wasn't a squib any longer!  
  
The next few days, the girls spent all their free time working with Ruth on improving her skills. She grew stronger and more confident everyday.  
  
"Man, I am so happy for Ruth," Deanna sighed as she laid down to go to sleep.  
  
"Yeah, but now what are we supposed to do? Dumbledore told us to find them, but he didn't say what to do next."  
  
"Oh yeah...How bout I ask Oliver tomorrow what he thinks if he doesn't know we can go to Dr. Money."  
  
"Yeah, let's run to Oliver and he can save the day! Oh Oliver!" Lauren shouted in a dramatic, feminine voice. "I'm a damsel in distress, help me!"  
  
"I will save you," Lauren shouted in a manly voice and jumping to her feet with her hands on her hips. "Have no fear, Oliver is here!"  
  
"Shut up! Your mom!" Deanna cried, blushing.  
  
"Your butt!"  
  
"Try Charlie's butt cause I see you looking at it all the time," Deanna laughed.  
  
At this, Lauren screamed, jumped on Deanna's bed and started hitting her with a pillow. Then Deanna jumped up and began to defend herself. She lunged at Lauren, missed and fell to the floor, hitting her face on the side of the desk.  
  
"Ohhhh," she groaned, "My face!"  
  
"Deanna, are you okay? Let me see!"  
  
Deanna took her hand off her face and Lauren laughed.  
  
"Oh, so this is funny, huh?"  
  
"No, but your face is funny!" Lauren laughed. "That's not how I meant it, but it sounded funny."  
  
Lauren stopped smiling when she saw the not-amused look on Deanna's face. She ran and got some ice and handed it to Deanna.  
  
"Looks like you might get that black eye you have always wanted," Lauren said carefully and then began to laugh as Deanna did.  
  
"Oh man!" cried Oliver. "What happened to you?"  
  
"Is there some mess we need to go clean up again?" Charlie laughed.  
  
"Well, maybe our room, but no," Lauren said. "We just had an accident last night."  
  
"Does it hurt?" Oliver asked as he gently touched Deanna's eye.  
  
"Nah! I'm tough. Just ask Lauren. I have always wanted a black eye and after all the wars I have been in, I have never had one."  
  
"Weird girl," Charlie muttered.  
  
"Eh?" Deanna asked.  
  
"Oh nothing, I was just looking at the uh...neat squirrel."  
  
"Actually, what led to this black eye began with talking about you guys," Lauren said changing the subject fast.  
  
"Oh really?" they both said smiling big. "Go on," Oliver said.  
  
"Well, we were wondering what to do next about Ruth," Deanna explained.  
  
"The reason you haven't seen much of us lately is because we have been working on her magical skills," Lauren said. "She is doing good, but we aren't the best teachers. Plus that isn't our job."  
  
"We were just wondering, what next?"  
  
"Uhhh....well...." sputtered Charlie as he and Oliver looked at each other, both clueless.  
  
"I think we need to pay Dr. Money a visit," Deanna laughed and began to walk towards his office.  
  
Dr. Money inspected the two girls over his full moon spectacles, "So you want to know what's next?" he asked them.  
  
Deanna nodded, "Yeah, we've found someone and now we're not sure what to do..."  
  
Dr. Money nodded thoughtfully, "Well...this morning I received this."  
  
He handed Lauren a letter which she opened immediately.  
  
Dear Miss Meredith and Miss Gragert,  
  
I know that you are on assignment for me right now, but I must ask you to do something else for me. It has come to my attention that you are needed in London asap. I will not tell you why, but make sure you go to Florean Fortescues Ice Cream shop in Diagon Alley at 9:00pm today. There you will receive further instructions.  
Also, make sure that you bring Ruth Ashley and Charlie Weasley. They will be of great help as well.  
  
Albus Dumbledore  
  
P.S. Miss Meredith, it has come to my attention that you and Oliver Wood are "Hot Stuff." Please inform Mr. Wood that he is of course invited as well.  
  
Deanna cloured visibly at the final note and then checked her watch, "Oh! Man, we need to catch a port-key to Diagon Alley soon – it'll be 9:00pm in England in five minutes!"  
  
Dr. Money handed the small group a Jellybean sandwich, "Here, everyone take this – y'all only have a few seconds."  
  
Ruth turned an interesting shade of green and managed to say, "Oh...I'm not a fan of port-keys..." before they all felt the familiar jerk from behind their belly buttons and zoomed through the air.  
  
They landed with a thud in front of Florean Fortescues and made their way inside. The store was quite dark and Mr. Fortescue wasn't in sight. The only person visible was sitting in a back booth taking a long swig of the pipe he was cradeling in his dirty left hand. A cloak covered his face, and only the stubble of a beard and long thin lips could be seen.  
  
Lauren's eyes brightened, "Aragorn!" she shouted happily and ran to embrace him.  
  
Deanna fell to her knee in reverence, "Your sire!"  
  
The man scowled deeply behind the hood, "Get up you silly little girl!" he said rudely.  
  
Charlie's brow furrowed together in thought, "Wait a minute...you don't sound like Strider!"  
  
The group looked at him in shock at this obvious disrespect to the King of Gondor.  
  
"Oh, sorry...we were buddies ya know – he was training at the same dragon camp I was...that's beside the point – he sounds like Snape!"  
  
The entire group gasped except Ruth who screamed melodramatically.  
  
"Snape?" Lauren questioned.  
  
"Sit down – there are spies all over the place!"  
  
The group sat down quickly and looked expectantly at the man sitting before them.  
  
"Yes, I am Professor Snape – I'm using Polyjuice Potion to disquise myself as the King of Gondor."  
  
"Why?" Wood asked.  
  
"Something very troubling has happened. Something that directly affects you," and at this he turned to Deanna, "I have heard that you are very close to the Prince of Mirkwood."  
  
Deanna paled, "Uh huh....we, um..." She shot a quick glance at Oliver, "We were romantically attached for several years."  
  
Oliver seemed to tense, but Snape ignored him and continued, "I'm afraid that I have some troubling news for you Miss Meredith. Prince Legolas has been kidnapped." Deanna passed out right there and the next few moments were spent with Oliver trying to revive her. Finally, Ruth reached in her pocket and found smelling salts which she gave to Oliver.  
  
Deanna sat up sputtering. Lauren sat down next to her and hugged her tightly.  
  
"It'll be allright Dee – we'll find the people who did this!" she said angrily.  
  
"Who?!" Deanna demanded, "Who did this to him?  
  
Snape looked at her – a hard determination evident in his jaw, "Two men...an older man by the name of Jack Sparrow and a young apprentice named William Turner. They are both pirates."  
  
"We have to find them!" Deanna shouted, "and soon!"  
  
The group all nodded. Charlie turned to Snape, "I'm rather confused – why did you decide to turn into King Elesar?"  
  
Snape muttered something under his breath.  
  
"Sorry, I didn't quite catch that," Oliver said as he stroked Deanna's hand reassuringly.  
  
"Because I want to be a king!" he shouted, and with that he disapparated with a pop.  
  
Meanwhile, Legolas wakes up in a daze to find himself in what seems to be a very dark and damp cave. His head is pounding in pain but he tries to stand to figure out where he is. Once he gets up he notices that the ground beneath him is made of wood and is moving slightly. He then looks around and sees a sliver of light coming from the ceiling with stairs leading up to them. He carefully climbs up them and pushes the ceiling up. Legolas is momentarily blinded by the bright light above him but regains control and climbs out. What he sees shocks him, but he begins to understand surrounding him on all sides is a bright blue ocean with no land in site. It is a beautiful ship with a black sail waving on top.  
  
"I must have been captured by pirates," Legolas says to himself. "But why?"  
  
He then hears voice coming from the bow of the ship and looks up to see two dirty men with long scraggly hair talking and laughing with each other. In a very quiet and catlike manner, Legolas sneeks toward them to hear what they are saying. As he takes a step to climb the stairs, the cabin door opens up to reveal a man with a parrot on his shoulder. At the same time that Legolas reaches for his bow and realizes that it is not there, the man has his sword at Lego's throat and the parrot says "I don't think so, laddy!"  
  
At this, the two men above turn around and the older one says in a very drunken voice, "NO! NO! Don't hurt him! He is our only way!"  
  
The parrot man slowly lowers his sword and still glaring, mutters some sort of an apology. Legolas nods his head in acceptance and then looks to the men above.  
  
"Come on up here elf boy and I will explain everything to you," said the one who is obviously the captain.  
  
Legolas cautiously climbs the stairs and comes face to face with a young man who looks strangly familiar, but doesn't know where from.  
  
The other one says drunkenly again, "My name is Captain Jack Sparrow, and this is my first mate William Turner," pointing to the familiar face.  
  
"We welcome you to the Black Pearl and apologize for the ill treatment, but special precautions had to be made. I hipe you can make yourself comfortable here and if you follow my few orders with no questions, you will be returned home soon."  
  
Sparrow immediately turned his back on Legolas and ordered Will to show him around the ship.  
  
The two awkwardly walked around while Will pointed out the important areas and where Legolas would sleep (or rest, Elves don't sleep).  
  
As will turned to get back to work, Legolas spoke up, "If you don't mind, can you tell me why I am here and where I know you from?"  
  
"No. I can't tell you why you are here, but like Jack, I mean the captain said, you will not be harmed if you obey. Secondly, I don't know where you know me from but I agree that you look strangely familiar."  
  
At this he turned away and left Legolas to his thoughts.  
  
While this is going on Deanna, Lauren and the gang are making a plan to rescue Legolas. It is a difficult task since they have no idea where he is, but then Ruth speaks up.  
  
"I remember learning of Sparrow and Turner when I was researching pirates (many funny looks at this) and I know that he usually stays in the Caribbean Ocean."  
  
"Oh, that's great but how are we supposed to find them in that huge area. They could be anywhere!" Deanna cried, getting frustrated with their lack of progress.  
  
"It's okay, Deanna," Oliver said reassuringly, "We will find them."  
  
She gave him a weak unreassured smile at this comment.  
  
"If only the ship had some kind of tracking device on it," Lauren said.  
  
"Oh!" Ruth cried surprising everyone.  
  
"What is it, Ruth?" Charlie asked.  
  
"How could I forget," she said. "I once met a guy who did keep track of all pirate  
  
boats, magicly I guess. We could go to him for help."  
  
"That's great! Let's go!" Deanna cheered.  
  
At this, Charlie conjured up a port-key to this guy's office and they were on their way.  
  
Luaren and Deanna walked into their room that night exhausted by the wild goose chase they had been on all day.  
  
"Dude, this guy's hard to find!" Deanna said grumpily.  
  
Lauren sank onto her bed, "No doubt...I'm not even going to put my jammies on."  
  
Deanna laid down on her bed, "Good idea."  
  
They reached over and turned off their lights and both fell into an uneasy sleep.  
  
Lauren was very confused. Her room seemed to be very bright for being in the middle of the night. She heard someone's voice whispering melodically.  
  
"The light of the evenstar does not wax and wane..." the voice said, "It was a gift...like my heart."  
  
Lauren kept her eyes closed shut trying to remember wehre she ahd heard that voice before. The voice continued.  
  
"Go to sleep..."  
  
Lauren's eyes flew open, "Arwen?"  
  
Arwen was standing with some sheer nightdress looking garment on. There was a garden not unlike one of the gardens of Rivendell and everything was bathed in a growing, soft light. Lauren was laying on some sort of lounge chair. Arwen's back was to her and Lauren watched as her shoulders moved as she sighed deeply.  
  
"Aragorn...that's not your line – oh!" Arwen had turned around and was quite surprised to find Lauren there instead of Aragorn.  
  
"Hey there, Arwen? How's that whole Elf queen of Gondor going?" Lauren asked smirking.  
  
Arwen was blushing noticibly, "I'm sorry, Lauren...wrong dream!"  
  
And with that, she disappeared.  
  
Meanwhile, Deanna's dreams were not so humorous. She was in the middle of a large sea, walking on the water and she watched as Legolas sank into the water.  
  
"Deanna! Save me!" he was shouting.  
  
Deanna tried to go to him, but stopped when she heard another voice very similar to her beloved, Legolas'.  
  
She turned and saw what could have been Legolas' twin brother sinking in the water as well. The only difference was this man ahd dark hair and a dashing goatee.  
  
"Deanna! Don't save him! Save me!" he shouted.  
  
Sine Deanna had no idea who this other person was, she rushed to Legolas and dragged him out of the water.  
  
He came up sputtering and then pointed at the man who was sinking, "Quack!"  
  
Deanna looked at him, "Huh?"  
  
He pointed again, "Quack!"  
  
Deanna shook her head, "Lego, I don't understand."  
  
"Quack! Quack! Quack! Quack!"  
  
"Deanna, wake up!"  
  
Deanna's eyes popped open, and she looked at Lauren in surprise, "I think Legolas is trying to tell me something..."  
  
"And so he's standing there, in my dream yelling 'quack!'" Deanna said.  
  
Ruth, Charlie, Oliver and of course, the illustrious Dr. Money were all looking at Deanna with very confused expressions evident on their faces.  
  
"Yeah, that's about what my reaction was," Lauren said from her spot on Charlie's lap. She stood up and looked at the small group of people in front of her.  
  
"So, what do we think quack means?" Lauren asked, her hands on her hips.  
  
Ruth raised her hand, "What is one of Legolas' favorite things to do?" "Kill orcs with his bow and arrow?" Charlie asked.  
  
Ruth shook her head, "Nope."  
  
"Slide down stairs on a shield?" Lauren guessed.  
  
Ruth shook her head again, "Nope, sorry."  
  
"Kiss my girlfriend?" Oliver asked bitterly.  
  
Ruth sighed, "No....though you need to take a look at your jealously problem there – whoa, tiger!"  
  
"I do not have a jealously problem!" Oliver shouted as he dragged Deanna over to him and place her on his lap.  
  
"Whatever, dude," Ruth said.  
  
"Can we please get to the point?" Lauren asked, tapping her foot impatiently.  
  
Dr. Money rose and stroked his chin, clearly deep in thought, "Perhaps...does he like to rhyme?"  
  
Deanna laughed, "Yeah...he's always reciting these stupid elf hymns."  
  
"Aren't you an elf?" Ruth asked.  
  
"Well, yes, but Lego was born like 1000 years before me and he's part of the 'older generation' we elves that were born about 800 years ago aren't really into the old hymns. We did the newer stuff. Have you ever heard 'The Prophecy of the Littledude and the Ring'?" Everyone shook their heads. Deanna sighed, "You're missing some good stuff."  
  
"But he likes to rhyme, right?" Dr. Money asked.  
  
"Yes....I guess so," Deanna shrugged.  
  
"Well....What if he was giving you a hint through rhyming? What rhymes with 'quack'?"  
  
Everyone thought long and hard. Finally, Charlie yelled, "Oh! Jack!"  
  
"Yes!" Ruth yelled back, "Jack Sparrow!"  
  
Deanna frowned, "But didn't we already know that?"  
  
Ruth grimaced, "Oh yeah..."  
  
"Well, now what?" Lauren asked.  
  
"We're back at square one, I suppose," Charlie sighed.  
  
That night when everyone else was asleep, Deanna got up, left the dorm, and snuck into the Presidential Dining Room where there was a fire place. She stepped in and whispered Three Broomsticks. When she arrived there she snuck into the basement and ran through the tunnel towards Hogwarts.  
  
"I hope he can help me," Deanna thought out loud, "because I don't know what else to do!"  
  
She arrived at the large wooden door, hesitated and then knocked. A few moments when by and Deanna was about to leave when the door opened.  
  
"What are you doing here?" Snape spat.  
  
"I...I...I want to talk to you about my dreams," Deanna stammered. "I know it's early but I had to sneak out at night. I didn't know who else to come to."  
  
Snape stared at her for a moment, softened the hard expression on his face and opened the door wider. Deanna smiled weakly and stepped inside. His room was very dark with only one small candle lit. Snape swished his wand and more torches were lit. Deanna continued to look around the room realizing that she had never been in a teacher's sleeping quarters before. She began to stare at a familiar picture on the wall when Snape cleared his throat and offered her a seat.  
  
Legolas awoke with a start. What had he been dreaming about? He looked around the dark, damp boat and remembered where he was. It had almost been a week and nothing had happened yet.  
  
"I wish there was a more precise way to communicate with Deanna. I tried to say 'Jack' and all that came out was 'Quack.' And tonight I couldn't even reach her!"  
  
At this he walked up onto the deck into the bright morning light. William was at the head of the boat and Legolas walked up to him.  
  
"G' morning, mate," Will greeted him.  
  
Legolas nodded.  
  
"I bet you are wondering when something is going to happen, aren't you?" Will asked.  
  
"Yes!" Legolas said. "Everyday I expect to be asked to do something and everyday I am left to myself. It's a good thing I trust you because I am not one to sit and do nothing."  
  
"Well, we will be arriving at our destination within a few days," Will explained. "And then you will get some action!"  
  
"And after I do my job for you? Then I get to go home right?"  
  
"Ummm....oh! G'morning, Jack" Will said very surprised.  
  
Legolas turned around and found hiself fact-to-face with the captain.  
  
"Having a nice chat?" Jack said, glaring at Will.  
  
"That's it! Good job!" Snape said.  
  
Deanna slouched back in her chair, exhausted from working many hours on entering someone's dreams. It was hard work.  
  
"Let's try one more time and then I think you will have it."  
  
Deanna stood up, cleared her mind and focused on Snape's, as he relaxed in his chair. She saw into his thoughts, concentrated on the message she wanted to get across and altered his thoughts to her message. At this he sat up straight and said, "I'm hungry, tired, and have to go to the bathroom."  
  
"You understood all of that?" Deanna said with a tired smile.  
  
"I sure did. I think you have it," Snape said with almost a smile on his face. "You better get out of here though. I have a class coming."  
  
"Alright, thanks so much," Deanna cried as she ran out the door.  
  
By the time she got back to the dorm, Lauren had already woken up, freaked out, called everyone and they were waiting for her (even the guys) in her room.  
  
"Holy crap! Where have you been, Deanna?" Lauren yelled when she opened the door.  
  
"I..." she started to say but was interrupted by Oliver grabbing her arm and saying, "Yeah! You can't just disappear like that!"  
  
"But..." she tried again and was interrupted again by Charlie saying, "You could have been anywhere with anyone!"  
  
"I LEFT A NOT Y'ALL!!" Deanna yelled angrily.  
  
"Oh," they all said while finding something interesting to look at on the floor.  
  
"Now, let me tell you where I was so I can get to work."  
  
After Deanna told them everything she made everyone leave and collapsed into a deep sleep.  
  
Coinicidentially, while Deanna slept, so did Legolas and he began to dream. In his dream he was on the boat and went upstairs. When he got ther ehe saw Deanna and Jack sword fighting. He ran towards them to help, but he ran right into an invisible wall that knocked him down. Will, who was dressed in a pink sundress, began to laugh at him but helped him up and said,  
  
"Listen."  
  
Legolas looked at Deanna and she said, "Find out where you are goin! We can't find you!"  
  
When Deanna said this, Legolas woke up and knew that he had to get it out of Will where they were going and then go back into Deanna's dreams and clearly tell her where to go. He had to help her find him or who knows what would happen to him.  
  
A week had gone by and Deanna was still not getting anything out of her dreams. She was exhausted and irritable. Lauren had given up trying to talk to her and instead was avoiding her like the black plague.  
  
"Will you pass me the Crasins?" Lauren asked very politely.  
  
"No!" Deanna shouted. "You want some? Well I've got them now and I'm not sharing!"  
  
Lauren winced noticeably and held back her tears. Her lower lip trembled noticeably, "Okay, Deanna....you can have the Crasins."  
  
Deanna rolled her eyes, "You big, baby! Find, I'll give you some Crasins," and as this she started pelting Lauren with Crasins.  
  
Lauren stood up and ran into the bathroom and started to sob.  
  
Just then, a knock was heard on the door. Lauren heard Deanna yell at her to get it and Lauren grabbed some toilet paper and wiped her eyes. She opened the door to her room and saw Ruth standing at the door.  
  
"Tough it up, Gragert. What are you? A Jedi or an Ewok?" Ruth asked handing her a handkerchief.  
  
Lauren stiffened, "I'm a Jedi, like my father before me!"  
  
Ruth rolled her eyes, "Act like it."  
  
She went over to Deanna, rustled in her pocket a moment and gave Deanna a small pill, "Eat this."  
  
Deanna scowled, "No!"  
  
"I'll slice you in half with a sword!" Ruth yelled.  
  
Deanna reached behind her, "You would die before your stroke fell!"  
  
Lauren rolled her eyes, gathered her wits and summoned her lightsaber, "Not this sword."  
  
Deanna grabbed the pill, ate it and passed out instantly.  
  
Lauren looked at Ruth, "Tranquilizer?"  
  
Ruth nodded, "She should be out for 24 hours."  
  
Lauren sighed, "Thank you so much!"  
  
She hugged Ruth fiercely, "Shall I go get Charlie? We can all go grab some Cajun Cones while Miss Meanie Pants sleeps."  
  
Ruth nodded, "Yes...and let's invite Oliver as well..."  
  
Meanwhile, Deanna slept soundly despite the fact that her friends and significant other were all having fun without her.  
  
And she dreamed.  
  
She opened her eyes to find herself hugging Legolas tightly. He pulled away from her and kissed her briefly on the lips. He turned from her and walked onto a white, sandy beach. Deanna watched as he pointed to something on the ground.  
  
"What's that?" she asked him quite puzzled.  
  
He continued to point at the object on the ground and Deanna leaned down to inspect it better.  
  
"It looks like...a black rock...Legolas, I'm very confused." She picked it up and realized that it was round and smooth. It looked like...  
  
"It's a black pearl!" Deanna exclaimed. "These are very rare. I hope you aren't suggesting that I use this for my engagement ring because I'm awfully partial to diamonds."  
  
Legolas silenced her with another kiss so powerful that it took her breath away.  
  
"Find me," Legolas whispered.  
  
Deanna woke up with a start and immediately wrote down her dream.  
  
Lauren, on the other hand, was dealing with her own problems. She was quite conflicted.  
  
She had just received a holo-vid from Jacen several days previous.  
  
He had smiled warmly and told her not to worry about him. He was good and well. He had blown her a kiss and told her that he loved her. His handome image had vanished and Charlie had apparated into her room.  
  
They were so much alike that it almost scared her.  
  
As she sat next to Charlie at Nelson park, slurping away on a Cajun Cone, she couldn't help but feel torn between the two men..  
  
Oliver and Ruth were happily talking about Quidditch, but Charlie, she noticed was eying her warily.  
  
And at that moment, she met his eye and saw something that she had never seen in Jacen's eyes before. And it was at that moment that she was in love with Charlie Weasley.  
  
Jacen who?  
  
Lauren, Ruth, Charlie, and Oliver apparated into the Sikes dorm room and saw Deanna pacing the floor furiously.  
  
She ran to them and quickly told them about her dream – taking little notice of the angered noises that Oliver was emmiting.  
  
Ruth nodded, "Well...I know just who to call..." and she left the room.  
  
The four left looked at each other, each of them confused.  
  
Charlie leaned in to Lauren and they shared a glance and an kiss that said everything without words. He whispered goodnight and apparated with a pop.  
  
Oliver seemed torn. Deanna's mind was clearly not with him. He settle on a distant hug from her and a kiss on the cheek – taking notice of the deep worry lines in her brow and the blood shot eyes. He too apparated elsewhere.  
  
Lauren's eyes met Deanna's and they said together, "We need to talk."  
  
They giggled slightly and then put their favorite movie in, popped a bag of popcorn and got out butterbeers, Dr. Peppers and a large bag of EveryFlavor Beans. They settled down to discuss the woes of being in love with two amazing men.  
  
"Wood?" Deanna asked quietly. "Can I talk to you outside?"  
  
The four of them were waiting in the dorm room the next morning for Ruth to return from wherever she had gone.  
  
"Yeah, sure," he said and stood up and walked out in the hall.  
  
Deanna followed looking like she was about to burst into tears. Charlie gave Lauren a puzzled look and then turned back to watch Trading Spaces.  
  
"This show is so great," he said quietly to himself and Lauren stifled a laugh.  
  
Deanna followed wood and shut the door behind her.  
  
"Let's sit down." Then Deanna just stared at her hands for a few minutes until Wood took them in his and said, "it's okay. Just go ahead."  
  
She took a deep breath and said, "I don't think we should be together anymore," and looked up.  
  
"Eh?"  
  
"Ok," deep breath, "It is not fair to you or me for us to continue our relationship. I like you a lot Wood and I could not have asked for a better boyfriend to be there for me here on earth. But that's just it. I don't think I need one here on earth because I cannot ever get Legolas out of my mind. I thought that once I got here I could forget about him, but now that all this has happened, I know that I can't. I am so sorry that I have led you on like this but now I am being honest."  
  
Tears were running down Deanna's face and she finally looked into his eyes. They were soft and forgiving but strong. He reached up to wipe a tear away and said, "I know."  
  
"What?" Deanna asked surprised at his response.  
  
"I knew all of that before you did."  
  
"Then why didn't you say something?!"  
  
"Because you needed to figure it out by yourself."  
  
Deanna thought about this for a minute and said, "So we are okay?"  
  
"Of course! I loved being with you and part of me wishes it wasn't this way but I know that you love Legolas and I don't want to keep you in pain because of that."  
  
"Oh, Oliver!" Deanna gave him a huge hug.  
  
"You ready to go back inside?" He asked when they let go. "I am sure they are dying to know what happened."  
  
As Oliver said this he tried to push open the door and it stuck for a second and then flew open as Lauren and Charlie scrambled to find a seat and watch the TV. When doing this Charlie tripped over Lauren's chair and fell on his face. They all waited in silence for a second and then all cracked up. Lauren caught Deanna's eye and knew everything was ok.  
  
As they were all laughing, Ruth ran in and said, "I know where he is!"  
  
They all stopped laughing and just stared at her.  
  
"Well, what are you waiting for? Let's go!"  
  
Everyone gathered their stuff together and waited for instructions from Ruth.  
  
"Well, I found out from a source that wishes to remain unknown that the Black Pearl is going to be docking at the Island of Kokamo within the next few days. So, let's go and see what happens."  
  
With that she pulled out a shell port-key and they were on their way to the Caribbean. When they arrived the sun was sinking into the ocean painting a beautiful sunset.  
  
"Why don't we go for a walk on the beach?" Lauren suggested. "It's getting late so we won't get much done tonight anyways."  
  
"Right, you guys go ahead and do that," Deanna said. "I have some things to do so I will meet you back here later."  
  
"Look for me by this light in three hours. When it comes on look for my feet."  
  
With that she turned and walked away, leaving the others with puzzle looks on their faces.  
  
"She will be fine," Lauren said. "Come on, Let's go!"  
  
After a while of playing on the beach the four came up and waited by the light post. Lauren looked down and saw Ruth and Oliver holding hands.  
  
"Woah! That didn't take long!"  
  
"Yeah, we have talked and Deanna and I agree that we are better apart than together," Oliver said blushing slightly.  
  
"So when did this happen?" Charlie asked pointing at their hands.  
  
"Just tonight," Ruth said quietly.  
  
"Well, that's cool, as long as everyone is happy and okay with it." As Lauren said this Deanna came running around the corner just as the street light came on. She was waving something in her hand and had an anxious look on her face. When she got to them. She opened her hand and a leaf from Legolas' cloak was inside.  
  
"I know! And after I found that, I searched around a little more and I saw the Black Pearl off in the distance."  
  
"Was it leaving?" Oliver asked.  
  
"No, it looked like it was sitting in one place."  
  
"Well, show us the way!" Ruth said.  
  
Deanna ran off and led the group to where the Black Pearl was sitting in the water. Lauren walked up to Deanna and placed a comforting hand on her shoulder.  
  
"Ready?" Lauren asked.  
  
Deanna nodded, "Yes, ma'am!"  
  
"All right, everyone!" Lauren yelled, "Circle up!"  
  
Everyone gathered around Lauren.  
  
"Okay group – the Black Pearl is right our there waiting for us. Wands ready?"  
  
The group pulled their wands out.  
  
"Lightsabers ready?" she giggled, "Only me!"  
  
They stuck their wands into their T-shirts and then started wading into the river.  
  
"Hey, Lauren?" Charlie yelled from the back.  
  
"Yeah?" she asked.  
  
"This water is really cold!"  
  
Lauren nodded, "Right....sorry about that! Wands out!"  
  
The group grabbed their wands.  
  
"Anti-freezing charm!"  
  
The group all placed the charm on themselves and continued to wade into the water. Eventually they were swimming. Finally they were upon the black Pearl.  
  
The group all treaded water around Lauren. She started to sink (she's not a very strong swimmer), so Charlie grabbed hold of her as she gave the group a pep talk.  
  
"Okay, everyone – be on the look out. These are going to be very scary pirates. Keep you focus on the task at hand. Wands out! I don't want ANY flashes of green light – hexes, curses, and charms only! No unforgiveables! Be strong and courageous! Do not be terrified! Do not be discouraged! For the Lord our God is with us!"  
  
The group followed her as she approached the ship. Charlie sighed, "She's a nutcase!"  
  
Deanna giggled, "Yes, but you love her."  
  
Charlie nodded, "Yes, I do – let's go kick some pirate BUTT!"  
  
They reached the ship and all hell broke loose. Pirates swarmed from all over the place and the small group of witches and wizards began hexing everything that was moving. Lauren ducked as a Jelly-legs jinx went flying over her head.  
  
Pirates were running away now with boils, burning hair, and no noses. They were screaming with fury and hiding. Lauren let out a whoop of triumph.  
  
"We shall conquer!" She yelled.  
  
"Where's Deanna?" Ruth asked.  
  
Lauren looked around, "I don't know...I hope she hasn't gotten into any trouble..."  
  
But Deanna had. She was standing below the deck and looking straight at the back of Jack Sparrow's head. Her heart pounded. If he turned around, she would be found. There wasn't any way to hide.  
  
"Well, aren't you in a bit of a pickle, my lady," he slurred.  
  
Deanna's heart stopped and dropped into her stomach. He turned around and it was all that Deanna could do to not drool on herself. He was very hot! Deanna pulled herself together.  
  
"Where's Legolas?" she demanded.  
  
"Come with me," he turned around and walked down the stairs. Deanna followed and was quite puzzled. They reached what looked like a room and Deanna followed him in.  
  
Legolas was sitting on a couch with his legs up. At the table across the room was a man who looked very much like him. They seemed to be having a nice conversation.  
  
"Lego!" Deanna shouted.  
  
He looked up and his entire face lit up. He ran to her and they embraced warmly.  
  
"Are you okay?" she asked as she continued to hug him. "Did they harm you in any way?"  
  
"I'm great! This has just been one HUGE misunderstanding!"  
  
"You were kidnapped!" Deanna shrieked.  
  
"Well...yes, but everything will be allright. They kidnapped me because of good reasons! Let me explain. They heard of me and you and Lauren and our whole gang of friends and they decided that they needed a challenge. So they kidnapped me! I've had a whole lot of fun. Jack and Will have taught me some fun new sword tricks!"  
  
Deanna was shaking her head, "It was all a ploy so that they could keep play Keep-Away with an elf?"  
  
William came up beside Legolas (man, they look alike!). "I'm sorry to have caused so much trouble, my lady...please forgive us!"  
  
Deanna grinned, "On one condition..."  
  
Jack joined them, "And what would that be?"  
  
"You have to join us...and you have to hear my favorite joke."  
  
Jack grimaced, "Allright, we'll join you...now tell your joke."  
  
Deanna grinned, "Have you seen the new Pirate movie?"  
  
Everyone shook their heads.  
  
"It's rated 'Arrrrgh!'"  
  
Everyone groaned except for Legolas who grabbed Deanna, and pulled her to him. "That was the best joke I ever heard!" he whispered before kissing her passionately.  
  
After explaining the mix up to everyone on deck, the others reluctantly offered counter-curses to the miserable pirates. Jack put his first mate in charge of his boat for the time he would be gone and then was ready.  
  
"Man, how are all of us going to get back to Abilene?" Legolas asked.  
  
"How bout the Knight Bus!" Deanna said cheerfully just as it pulled up.  
  
"Woah! What kind of boat is that?" Will asked trying to see what was holding it up.  
  
"It's magic," Ruth laughed as she stepped onto the bus with Oliver close behind her.  
  
Everyone climbed on, met Stan and Ernie and were on their way. When they got back to Abilene it was still dark and they decided to all crash at Charlie and Oliver's house. Will and Jack were asking a million questions but everyone was to tired to answer.  
  
"Okay," Charlie murmured while holding Luaren up as she fell asleep against him. "Girls in my room, guys can sleep wherever they want."  
  
Legolas hugged Deanna goodnight and let go of her hand but she wouldn't loosen her grip.  
  
"Don't worry," he said pulling her close again. "I will still be here when you wake up."  
  
She hesitantly released her grip and he kissed her on the forhead and whispered, "May the peace of Rivendell rest on you tonight."  
  
Ruth and Oliver hugged goodnight and Charlie and Lauren did the same.  
  
"Do you feel a little left out?" Jack asked Will as he watched all this.  
  
"Yeah, but I'm too tired to worry about it. Let's get some sleep and we can figure it all out tomorrow."  
  
Within ten minutes the whole house was silent.  
  
The next day everyone slept in and woke to the smell of Charlie cooking breakfast. It took a while, but by 2:00 pm everyone was up waiting to eat.  
  
"Hey, Mrs., I mean Mr. Weasley!" Oliver said to Charlie, "Who taught you how to cook?"  
  
Everyone laughed and Lauren got up and gave hi ma kiss on the cheek and whispered something in his ear.  
  
After the long process of everyone getting ready and trying to convince Jack and Will to take a shower and change clothes, they headed to the campus. Everyone was enjoying the funny expressions and questions that came from Will and Jack while they got a tour of the beautiful ACU campus.  
  
"What happed to this place?" Jack asked.  
  
"Did your enemies come in and chop down all the trees to torture you?"  
  
"No," Ruth laughed. "That's just the way this area looks. Don't worry. You get used to it."  
  
While all this is going on, Deanna and Legolas are walking next to each other but she can't help staring at Will. It all seems so weird but no one else seems to notice. Will keeps catching Deanna staring at him and it is very awkward. Deanna decides to be brave and talk to Legolas about it. She grabs his hand to pull him to the back of the group. He follows but is surprised at her PDA.  
  
"What's going on?" Legolas asked.  
  
"Okay, maybe it's just me but you and Will look a lot alike and it's really getting to me."  
  
Legolas laughed and then stopped when he saw the serious look on her face and said, "Is that all?"  
  
"Yes, that's all, but doesn't it make you wonder too?"  
  
"Yes, but I guess I have just gotten used to it. He's a really nice guy, give him a chance."  
  
Soon they found themselves at Dr. Money's office ready to explain everything. When they walked in, he wasn't there and his secretary told them that he had been gone a few days and would be expected back at any time.  
  
"Would you like me to contact you when he arrives?"  
  
"Yes, ma'am," Charlie said politely. "That would be great."  
  
After this they decided to go out to Nelson park and hang out till Dr. Money got back. They all had a lot of fun trying to play frizbee and then feeding the ducks. Deanna called the girls over and whispered something to them. Five minutes later they looked at each other, pulled out their wands and pointed them at the guys saying, "Wingardium Leviosa."  
  
The girls held them over the water and then with a flick of their wands, dropped them in. Soon, an all out war broke out. Legolas was standing to the side with an unhappy expression on his face.  
  
"Come on, Elf!" Jack cried while continuously dunking Deanna under the water. "Come save your girl, or are you afraid you will tangle your hair and get dirty?"  
  
Hearing this Legolas put aside his gracefulness and launched himself at Jack. The war went on for a long time until the guys finally called truce. They clumbed up on shore and all laid down to rest.  
  
Then Will cried out and pointed towards the sky. "That owl is headed straight for us. How weird."  
  
"No, silly," Ruth laughed. "That's how the wizarding world communicates."  
  
She took the note when the owl came to her and began to read. Her face paled and Oliver ran to her and asked, "What's wrong?"  
  
She handed him the note and he read it outloud.  
  
EMERGENCY! Come to the office immediately! Dr. Money needs you!  
  
They were immediately on their way. When they arrived they found the secretary sitting at her desk crying. They looked in Dr. Money's office and it was trashed.  
  
"Holy parrots!" Will cried. "What happened?"  
  
"Is Dr. Money okay?" Lauren asked in a worried voice. Charlie took her hand and squeezed it tightly.  
  
The secretary calmed herself down and looked at them all. "I sent for you as soon as I understood who y'all are. I am a witch, too."  
  
"Why didn't you ever tell us?" Deanna asked.  
  
"Because Dr. Money thought it would be safer if we were kept a secret from each other because of things like this happening."  
  
"Well, what happened?" Oliver asked, getting impatient.  
  
"Dr. Money was taken while on a trip and they gave him a virus. There is onlyu one antidote for the virus and to get it we have to expose who y'all are and turn you over to them."  
  
"Oh, my gato!" Deanna said along with everyone else's surprised expressions. They all turned and looked funny at her. "I...I...I heard someone on campus say it. Sorry!"  
  
"So what do we do?" Ruth asked.  
  
"Well we can't let Dr. Money die, but they are trying to stop us from finding new recruits and we can't let that happen either," Lauren said.  
  
"I say we hunt the enemies down, take the antidote and make them walk to plank...or something like that," Jack shouted.  
  
"We're with you, Jack! Let's start by searching his office for clues."  
  
"Oh, by the way," the secretary said, "He is in a private hospital in London and you have 72 hours to cure him. God be with you."  
  
An hour later found the group of friends all sitting in a circle in silence. They were completely out of ideas and very frustrated about it. Lauren looked around the room and saw everyone staring off into space. She sighed and racked her brain to try and think of an idea. She thought through her somewhat short life and then remembered some friends that Jacen's family had talked about. She hadn't talked to Jacen in a while. So, she got up quickly and ran from the lobby of Sikes and upstairs to her room. She dove under her bed and found her comm. unit.  
  
"Jacen," she said into it. Moments later, his handsome face appeared and her heart when out of to him. It had been almost a week since she'd seen him.  
  
"This is Master Solo," he said automatically.  
  
"Jacen!" she said happily.  
  
His face broke into a huge grin, "Lauren!"  
  
"I've missed you so much!" Lauren cried, "I wish I had more time to talk."  
  
His face fell, "What's wrong, my love?"  
  
Laruen's eyes pricked with tears, "Oh, Jacen! I'm so confused and I really need to talk to you, but there's something more important I need to talk to you about."  
  
He nodded, "Yes, I've felt your indecisiveness, but we'll talk more about that later. What is so important?"  
  
"I need you to think of a name for me. I know your parents have had dealings with earth before and I need you to remember who they talked with."  
  
Jacen nodded, "I can't remember their names off the top of my head, but I know that they were a part of some form of American law enforcement. Jaina might remember, try her." His face softened, "I love you, Lauren. Get back to me whenever you can."  
  
And with that he disappeared from her comm. Unit. "Oh, Jacen...I love you, too..." and even though he never heard her, she felt his Forces sense touch her heart and give her peace.  
  
She snapped out of her momentary reverie and automatically dialed Jaina's number.  
  
"Commander Jaina Solo," she replied grouchily. Her face was flushed pink and her eyelids were heavy.  
  
"Jaina!" Lauren squealed, "It's been way too long!"  
  
Jaina's face brightened and Lauren saw Jag Fel's face join Jaina's, "Lauren! We have to get together!"  
  
Lauren nodded emphatically, "Yes! And I hate to cut this short, but I really must. I need information quickly!"  
  
Jaina nodded, "I understand...I need to get back to something myself," and she nodded towards Jag.  
  
Lauren giggled, "I need the name of your parents' contacts in America."  
  
Jaina looked pensive for a moment, "I believe their names were Agents Mulder and Scully...they were a part of the Federal Bureau of Investigation. They helped my parents and Uncle Luke and Aunt Mara a lot."  
  
Lauren nodded and began writing their names sown, "Fantastic! I have to run, but thank you, Jaina!"  
  
And with that, she turned off the comm. And ran back downstairs.  
  
"Where did you go?" Deanna asked, "Did you have to go take a poo?"  
  
Lauren laughed, "No...but I did find out a way we can try to find Dr. Money."  
  
The group let out a gasp together.  
  
"We need to get to Washington D.C."  
  
They reached the Apparition spot in Washington DC and looked around. Right in front of them was the Federal Bureau of Investigation. They looked at each other and Deanna finally stepped forward, "COME ON GUYS! WE HAVE TO FIND DR. MONEY!!"  
  
They had no trouble getting down to the basement where Jaina told them they would find Agent's Mulder and Scully. Lauren used her Jedi mind powers to get them past all the guards. Finally, they reached the basement and Charlie pointed out a sign on a door labeled Fox Mulder and Dana Scully.  
  
They knocked on the door and then entered. A petite red-head was shouting at tall sheepish looking man.  
  
"GOOD GRIEF MULDER! How do you expect me to believe that extraterrestrials have taken over the cheese industry?!?!"  
  
He rolled his eyes, "Scully, I told you- MY CHEAP CHEESE WON'T MELT!!"  
  
"And the automatic conclusion you make is that an alien force has taken hold of the cheese industry of the world?! Could it be that you are too cheap to buy real cheese? Or maybe it's not melting because it's changed chemical form from being in your refrigerator to long!"  
  
They didn't see to notice their visitors until Oliver cleared his throat loudly. The two jumped at the sight of the crowd in their office.  
  
"Can I help you?" Scully asked in a tense voice.  
  
Lauren stepped forward, "Yes, I'm so sorry to bother you, but I was sent here by my very good friend Jaina Solo. We're in a bit of a bind here..."  
  
She was interrupted by a very enthusiastic Deanna, "Someone stole our Money!!!"  
  
Scully looked confused, "I'm sorry, but that's not usually something that we help with here at the FBI. We have better things to do..."  
  
Ruth rolled her eyes, "Ignore her, she means the president of our university. His name is Dr. Money."  
  
Scully nodded, "And why did Jaina send you to us?"  
  
Lauren stepped up, "Well, she told me that you deal with strange phenomena and see... Dr. Money is a wizard."  
  
At this, Mulder's ears perked up, "Wizard?"  
  
Deanna nodded, "Yes, as we all are. And I'm an elf and Lauren here is a Jedi."  
  
Mulder grinned and looked at Scully expectantly.  
  
"Of course, we'll help you," Scully said rolling her eyes.  
  
"Great!" Mulder said jumping up and clapping his hands together as they began exiting the room. "Now tell me all about being a wizard....And you're an elf?  
  
Wow....this is the most amazing day of my life, living proof of the paranormal!"  
  
Lauren hung back and fell into step with Scully as she heard Charlie say indignantly, "Who you calling paranormal, muggle?"  
  
Scully sighed, "He drives me insane, but I love him."  
  
Lauren nodded, "I understand completely."  
  
She watched as Charlie jumped away from Mulder's hand, "No, you can't touch me! I'm not that special! Ahhh!"  
  
Scully and Lauren giggled as they watched Charlie run away from Mulder.  
  
"The truth is out there...." Scully muttered.  
  
Mulder and Scully decided the best place to start would be Dr. Money's office. Charlie provided a port-key, handed it to Mulder as he was holding Scully's hand and all other non-apparaters touched it at the same time, and they all ended up crowded in the office.  
  
"Why don't we get out of their way and let them look around," Lauren suggested.  
  
The secretary had taken some time off so they all sat down in the waiting room.  
  
Deanna began to look around the room and said, "Hey! Where are Jack and Will?"  
  
Everyone else looked around also and Charlie said, "I have no idea. When was the last time anyone saw them?"  
  
Ruth wandered out into the hallway and called out, "Y'all! Come here!"  
  
They all ran out into the hall and saw the note left for them on the door with a knife holding it up.  
  
"Bloody Junk! They left!" Deanna cried.  
  
Charlie read the note aloud and it said that they enjoyed their time with everyone but they missed the ocean too much. They apologized and said if we ever needed something to come to them for help.  
  
"Well, they didn't last long," Lauren said sadly.  
  
"Yes, but I understand why they left. Being in this dry and barren land for only a few days makes me ached for the beautiful trees of Mirkwood and the flowing rivers of Rivendell."  
  
He and Deanna both got a glazed look in their eyes and then snapped baqck to reality.  
  
The from inside the office, Mulder called to them saying, "Hey guys! We found something."  
  
The group ran into the office and saw him holding a pin that said "Kiss me. I'm Irish."  
  
"This is the clue we have been looking for! I know exactly where to go now," Mulder said excitedly.  
  
Everyone but Scully looked at him with a confused look and then Ruth spoke up and said, "Um, maybe I'm alone in this but how is that a clue? And how do you know where to go?"  
  
They all nodded in agreement.  
  
"Oh, well the guys who took Dr. Money work in the London Irish Pub in downtown London. I thought that was obvious."  
  
"Wow! You know all that by looking at the pin?" Legolas asked.  
  
"You definitely deserve some Genius Points!" Deanna laughed.  
  
"Well, what are we waiting for? Let's go to London!" Lauren said.  
  
At this they we're on their way.  
  
"Ummmm, did we come to the right place?" Deanna asked looking around at the area they were in.  
  
It was a very dark street with no-so-nice looking people around them. Some men in a corner were eying the guys.  
  
"Let's get going," Charlie said ushering everyone down the street.  
  
"Wow!" Deanna said looking at a girl standing outside of her door. "What a cute outfit." She stopped and started to ask where she got her clothes until Charlie grabbed her arm and pulled her away.  
  
"Don't be jealous, honey," the girl said to Charlie as he walked quickly away. Then looking up he saw Legolas conversing with another girl up the street.  
  
"Legolas, NO!" he shouted.  
  
After some more confusion, Charlie finally got everyone off that street and onto a better one.  
  
"Why are you acting like this, Charlie?" Lauren asked with a scowl on her face.  
  
"Yeah!" Deanna added. "We were just being friendly."  
  
"Are you completely ignorant?" he asked. "Those weren't normal friendly people. They were rally friendly."  
  
"I don't think I understand," Legolas said.  
  
"Oh my goodness!" Ruth butted in. "They were prostitutes!"  
  
Lauren got it but Deanna and Legolas still looked confused. Oliver leaned over and whispered something to them and their expressions changed from confused to shocked and then red with embaressment.  
  
"Oh," they both said finding something interesting to look at on the ground.  
  
After this they met Mulder and Scully at the street they were supposed to be at.  
  
"I can't believe you didn't know what they were," Mulder said elbowing Deanna in the side.  
  
"Well, in Middle Earth we don't have those kind of people. How was I supposed to know?" Deanna thought for a few more minutes and then asked, "Did the girl who talked to me fancy girl's bums like Matt fancies boy's bums?"  
  
At this Mulder started cracking up and nodded his head saying, "I don't know who Matt is but I assume yes."  
  
"Wow! I have never really seen London before," Ruth said standing in awe of the beautiful city. "It's amazing!"  
  
"Yeah, it is," Oliver said standing in awe of Ruth. "I miss it a lot."  
  
"Hey, maybe someday when we run out of things to do we could open a bookstore here," Lauren said. "That would be so much fun."  
  
"London is probably the best city on this earth," Deanna said. "We always had so much fun when we would sneek out of Hogwarts to come visit."  
  
Charlie and Oliver gave her a surprised look at this comment.  
  
"Well, here we are," Scully said butting in. "The London Irish Pub."  
  
"Let's try and not look to obvious here, okay guys," Mulder said.  
  
"Maybe just us two should go in," Scully said.  
  
"No! He's our Money! We are going, too," Lauren cried.  
  
"Wands ready," Charlie ordered getting a funny look from Mulder and Scully. "Maybe, hide them a bit, but ready."  
  
"Let's go," and Mulder pushed open the door. 


End file.
